10th Jan – I hear the train a comin’ It’s rolling round the bend, And I ain’t seen the sunshine, since I don’t know when.

But how anyone, can have a favourite Spice Girl other than Sports, strikes me as absurd. It’s just plain wrong on every important metric: looks, talent, singing, dancing, niceness.

29 May – Upside down boy, you turn me inside out and round and round.

Yet, true and dedicated advocates of Girl-Power, must always be alive to the charge of misogyny. The old ways are changing, but we must be careful not to assert entitlement over what is essentially female territory.

June 29th – The sun’ll come out tomorrow, Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, There’ll be sun.

It is not in my nature to carry a weapon, but should any agents of the state decide to investigate, they’ll discover that I have fashioned a stick like the one Gabriel Oak used to cure abdominal bloating in sheep