He was hard to dislike Savage, for the spare Yo-Yo bars he always carried with him.
5th March – What goes up, must come down, Spinning wheel got to go round.
Category: The Diary
28th Feb – You are the apple of my eye, Forever you’ll stay in my heart.
Over time, we may add more groundlings, so that the celebrity bottom feeder is forced to face an authentic slice of their real audience.
Feb 23rd – I’m not the kind of man who tends to socialise, I seem to lean on old familiar ways.
She’d been sat between us at dinner and had this sort of flaky skin, most of which stayed on the seat when she got up.
18th Feb – Like a circle in a spiral, like a wheel within a wheel, Never ending or beginning on an ever spinning reel.
In a world which celebrates marriage at first sight, and the televised sharing of STDs between teenagers, this sounds like Kenneth Clarke's Civilisation to me.
Feb 14th – Black and orange stray cat sittin’ on a fence, I ain’t got enough dough to pay the rent.
This is the great beauty of the law: it does not do a great deal for compensating the wrongs done to innocent victims, but it’s an absolute boon to each and every rotten egg for its manifold spoiling tactics.
February 3rd – Guess who’s coming to dinner? Natty Dreadlock.
‘You’ll sell that idea better to Gemma Collins than you will Julia Roberts,’ he said. Then went silent again.
Jan 26th – Mama weer all crazee now.
Thinking about it all again now, it seems far more likely that I am older than I am.
22nd Jan – You can thank your lucky stars that we’re not as smart as we’d like to think we are.
This notion has gained such traction with me that I am starting to think that my father may not have been that bad after all; persuading myself to look at him and his sort like exhibits in a museum from whom I have evolved.
19th Jan – Signifyin’ Monkey, stay up in your tree, You are always lying and signifyin’, But you better not monkey with me.
‘You’re one of them now,’ he said, ‘a talentless gobby prick with ideas above his station and work to match.’
12th Jan – You’re gonna reap just what you sow.
A lesser man might once have been embarrassed at making such a gaff. The trick is, to act like you still meant it after your error has been explained to you.
