Category: The Diary

Easter Sunday 2026 – News of great joy, news of great mirth.

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Rejoice! Rejoice! what more hopeful news could we have wished for in these troubled times, when wicked infidels conspire to close shipping and trade routes to the free God-loving Christians of the world, than this? Shipping routes, ВТШ, that were open and free to travel for anyone, just six weeks ago! https://www.youtube.com/embed/6iHjbG3jtHM?si=6XhAYHO6J3NLMQCc&start=120%20&end=162 Paula White, our … Continue reading Easter Sunday 2026 – News of great joy, news of great mirth.

5th March -When no-one else can understand me. When everything I do is wrong.

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Two hours before tomorrow became today, we crossed the border into Scotland, and about four or so hours after that, as the Moray Firth first came into view, we diverted from our route to the Highlands, to take a peek at the Secret Beach, half an hour away to the east. I held the map … Continue reading 5th March -When no-one else can understand me. When everything I do is wrong.

25th Jan – Field and fountain, moor and mountain.

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LEGAL NOTICE I’ve always believed that the definition of a good childhood, and so the ultimate production of an accomplished, balanced, and happy adult, with the capacity for empathy and joy, who is possessed of self-esteem, moral clarity, and sufficient courage to see all that through, is evidenced, not to say created by their family’s … Continue reading 25th Jan – Field and fountain, moor and mountain.

Jan 6th – Come on, it’s lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you.

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We come to the night. I’m telling you this for the simple reason that it’s the moment of the pivot. The last of the then, before the now. Epiphanic? Steady on. A few chapters in the new Book of Dave? Dickie White’s letters to the Apostates? —I don’t think so. But a dividing line, nonetheless. … Continue reading Jan 6th – Come on, it’s lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you.

17th Dec – Play your didgeridoo, Blue.

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We have been overwhelmed by the letter in our mail sack, and feel that in light of all the interest, we must publish results of our latest competition ahead of the intended date. First out of the sack, and received within a few seconds of the competition going live, was a correct answer from a … Continue reading 17th Dec – Play your didgeridoo, Blue.

12th Dec – got my feet on holy ground.

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Yes, I know. The eagerly awaited next instalment re: what happened to the odious Iain Bon-Bon Collings is coming. In the meantime, please accept a commercial break. It helps keep the whole enterprise running, and hopefully, will enrich at least one of our loyal readers. We salute each and everyone of you, including those, who … Continue reading 12th Dec – got my feet on holy ground.

Nov 30th – out of the tree of life, I just picked me a plum.

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There are certain mouths so busy that no matter how many Strepsils their owner sucks, they can never quite keep pace with the number of dicks to which they do the same. In this way, strep, despite best intentions, are accidentally transferred in large numbers into the cock’s eye. And, so, before you know it, … Continue reading Nov 30th – out of the tree of life, I just picked me a plum.

Nov 16th – So, if you’re down on your luck, I know you’ll all sympathise…

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Do you remember when Friend John and I returned to the UK in the spring of last year? I can talk about this now that he has passed to the other side. I’d prefer to say, ‘Now that he is dead,’ but we do keep receiving emails from him in purgatory, so I guess, until … Continue reading Nov 16th – So, if you’re down on your luck, I know you’ll all sympathise…

28 Oct – Fifteen minutes with you, well, I wouldn’t say no.

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So, I’ve heard from Friend John. Whether the message comes from limbo, or his fevered imagination before passing, it’s hard to tell. It’s his second message since meeting his end, and, given that he had virtually no followers to tune into his genius, I pass it on, to honour his memory. It may be AI, … Continue reading 28 Oct – Fifteen minutes with you, well, I wouldn’t say no.

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