It's like measuring the time of a 100m sprint to the hundredth of a second, having started it with a flag.
7th March – Varsity football is rank amateur.
Tag: Gary Lineker
16th Feb – Accent, you ate the positive.
It's as if Gary Lineker had sired a bastard offspring with Simon Armitage, and I had been shat out of The Poet Laureate’s breeches.
July 10th – Back home, we’ll be thinking about you, while we’re not that far away.
I am prepared to legislate to provide England with a system of 4-4-4.
May 7th – Dreams will come and they will go, when the rain washes you clean, you’ll know.
This must be how it feels to live in a totalitarian state. To be a victim of ever declining standards where there is not a single person of discernment and authority to whom you can appeal.
Dickie White's Diary 